Movie Review: The Bucket List

A Movie Review
by Antenna Wilde

Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman star as two men with 6 months to live in The Bucket List; a movie directed by Rob Reiner, which would be better named, The Bucket of Shit List. That way, I wouldn’t have wasted my time downloading it illegally off the web. Sure, the movie was free, but that doesn’t mean I liked it. And in that respect I’m glad there’s piracy in the world.

You would think with two great actors like Nicholson and Freeman you’d have a decent shot at seeing a classic, but instead what you get is a laborious and unconvincing display of mediocrity—until the end, which wasn’t that bad. And when I say the end, I mean the last 5 minutes (which probably should have been the beginning to another, much better movie).

The screenplay seemed intent on showing how the characters relationship develops and the humanizing effect it had during their last days on earth, but instead we end up seeing two old guys acting like they wished Rob Reiner would hurry up and finish shooting the film already.

I kept wishing for that too. The best part was when I neglected to pause the DVD and farted my way into the kitchen to do the dishes; there, I daydreamed with the soapy sponge until I forget where I was, then remembered before meandering back to the show carrying a bowl full of beer nuts.

If I had to sum up the movie, I say: imagine Morgan Freeman’s character in The Shawshank Redemption buddying up with Nicholson’s character from About Schmidt, then listen to them both being sick in the next room while you’re sitting on the toilet; taking a Sunday afternoon shit with yesterday’s newspaper. It’s just about that interesting.